Posts Tagged meditation
Bad experiences sometimes leave deep wounds on our psyche – scars that take a long time to heal. While time generally does heal most wounds, we don’t do ourselves any favors by going back and picking at them. In fact, replaying bad experiences over again in your mind is a recipe for disaster, for the negative thoughts and emotions that were buried can be brought back to life with explosively destructive force, just like a landmine buried long ago in a forgotten war. The cultivation of greater mindfulness, however, can help us navigate through this personal minefield, alerting us whenever we get too close to danger.
Some of us do a better job than others of just going with the flow of life, and not spending too much time looking back with regret, recrimination, or guilt, to name just a few of the toxic emotions that can accompany our memories. But for almost all of us, there have been some particularly painful moments along the way, and these are the landmines that we must map out and stay away from, lest we unleash a damaging flow of thoughts and emotions. The emotions associated with past traumas don’t just make us miserable; they also have creative (which in this case means destructive) potential, transforming the events that transpire in our outer reality as well as the inner landscape which can often be bad enough by itself.
What sort of events have you buried?
- An argument with a co-worker or family member?
- An accident that you caused?
- The death of a loved one or pet?
- Rejection by an object of your affection?
- Getting fired from a job?
- Failing a test at school?
- Saying something that hurt someone else’s feelings?
- Betraying a friend’s confidence?
- A period of severe poverty and insecurity?
- The time other people abused you verbally or physically?
Obviously, the list is endless. There’s a pretty good chance that you’re working on something in your own list right now. Our inherent “negativity bias” is almost irresistible, constantly drawing us back to the worst memories and the most negative expectations for the future. That sort of thinking once made sense in an earlier evolutionary environment, where the avoidance of real threats to our survival was paramount, but in today’s generally much safer world, this default “doom and gloom” setting does us no favors at all.
Awareness of the Danger Will Protect You
While conventional mindfulness practices, which teach us to be aware of what we’re doing, moment-to-moment, with our minds, can tell us when we’re dwelling on negative memories, they don’t do nearly enough to inform us about the very real danger of this type of thinking. Buddhist mindfulness does not embrace the much more modern New Age concept that we create our physical realities with our thoughts and emotions, and simply confines itself to inner reality.
While there is undoubtedly real benefit to be derived from a more harmonious inner life, the real danger we must avoid is the physical manifestation of our negative thoughts and feelings. This danger is very real, and the power of our most upsetting memories is particularly likely to expose us to harmful manifestations. For unlike the positive manifestation goals so beloved of self-help authors like Rhonda Byrne, we know exactly what these bad experiences feel like and we can remember every little painful detail in technicolor glory. In short, it’s much, much easier to create bad realities than good ones, and we have to police ourselves constantly to protect ourselves from these self-inflicted wounds.
So the next time you catch yourself dwelling upon the worst events of your past, just stop. No matter how justified you feel you are in rehashing that event, you must remind yourself of the power of your thoughts and emotions. A simple way to manage yourself is to ask whether you want to relive that experience – or something very similar to it – again. Because if you don’t watch out, that is exactly what will happen.
ABOUT THE AUTHOR
When replaying past events, one of the most damaging thought patterns we must avoid is that of self-blame. Critics of the New Age use that issue as an argument against the reality-creation principle, but it is – ironically – a strong argument in favor of New Age ideas. To see why, visit this thoughtful Meditation Blog.
- Recovering our True Self: The Journey Out of Our Negative States (mediumsworld.wordpress.com)
Down through the centuries, spiritual teachers of all traditions have differentiated between our mundane, invented personality so filled with stress, and our true identity characterized by serenity, constancy, and wisdom. They urge us to discover our inner depths and that vaster Self which enables right action in the world. Everyone of us is meant to live with joy and compassionate outreach to the people around us. We are designed to be masters of our selves, capable of overcoming all the difficulties of life. This is our birthright, but in order to experience it, we must recognize how far we are from living in this manner, why this is so, and what efforts we must make to live in such a way. This new awareness and these efforts are the process that leads us out of our negative emotional habits in order to enter into the depths of our spiritual nature.
To recover from our ingrained habits and our subconscious imitations of parents and peers is truly spiritual warfare. It is the narrow way that few want to travel as it requires going against the grain of our own behavior. It is making the hard choices rather than taking the easy way as we always have. This process takes place in the trenches of our most ordinary interactions with the world. Authentic spiritual development takes place in that moment of irritation, that moment of unkindness, that moment of selfishness that we encounter the heat of the battle. This inner battle determines who we are and how we live this life during our brief journey through time.
Here then are some specific methods for recovering from those toxic habits:
The first and most fundamental effort is the objective study of ourselves. Why? Because nothing real can take place until we know what we are dealing with. We cannot take for granted that we know how or why we function the way we do. If you want to operate a computer, you have to learn the software. Human beings are complex software indeed and are rarely user friendly. So tryobserving yourself from a completely neutral standpoint. Do not judge what you see. Just see it. Observe your reactions, your attitudes, your moods and the many aspects of yourself that take charge from moment to moment. If you do this with sincerity and courage, not justifying every action and passing thought, you will begin to see yourself more objectively and initiate the awareness of the Observing Self who will be the key to your recovery.
This simple effort begins the process of creating a space within you that is not completely hypnotized by external events. Though you still react to external circumstances through ingrained habit, there is now this sliver of your Self that is not pulled out of you. A new space of inner freedom is being created along with a new sense of a deeper identity than the surface personality.
Another critical aspect of this observation is the study of our negative states. You will be amazed at how much of our time is spent under the dominance of these dark moods and thoughts. You will catch yourself grumbling about other people, feeling dejected over this or that event, complaining about the weather, resenting something somebody said. Nothing healthy can grow under the constant downpour of this acid rain within you. Eventually, you will discover that you can free yourself from such unpleasant behavior and states of mind. Step one is to turn off the leaking faucet: stop expressing negative emotions.
This effort is the beginning of separating yourself from them. You don’t have to accept living in those dark states. You are not them. They are bad habits acquired over a lifetime. If you want healing and joy in your life, you must stop the momentum of negativity. One of the important things to observe about negative states is how much energy they take away from us. If you are aware of yourself before and after a moment of rage, you will see very clearly how much energy has been lost in that brief moment. We only have so much energy available to us each day, and we can use it to be healed and renewed, or we can squander it thoughtlessly.
So notice your thoughts before they plant themselves in your feelings and eventually manifest in your actions. Anger at a colleague or spouse can be caught before it has caused internal and external damage. In that more rational, detached place before the feeling has caught you by the throat, you can notice why you are angry. What is it in you that is reacting that way? What is it in your colleague that has caused his or her behavior which is so disturbing? Anger can then turn into compassion, or at least into a new insight about yourself or another.
After self-observation and separation from negative states comes the next all-important practice: becoming present to the moment. Experience the moment as it is, for what it is. Becoming present grounds you in reality here and now and takes you out of the tempests of imagination and inner talking that fill the mind with so much noise. Become present not only to your surroundings, but to your body. Relax the tensions that you haven’t even noticed before: In the shoulders, in the jaws, in the stomach. Begin to experience the revitalizing peace of being alive in this moment. Those of you familiar with meditation know how helpful it is to regulate one’s breathing in order to center oneself. Just breathing in and out slowly to ease the inner tensions is a powerful tool for nourishing your spirit in the moment. Learn to sit quietly for awhile. This is no luxury or idle behavior. We are so wracked with stress and worry that we cannot recover enough to get back in touch with ourselves until we are released from the grip of our anxieties. We rob ourselves of the very joy of living when we let ourselves fall into endless worry and nervous tension. Take time to let go of all that.
This daily effort teaches us to stop or at least to step back from the constant flow of thoughts that creates reality for us. This means that most of our worrying and anxious considerations fall by the wayside and we are able to rise above the clouds of our immediate concerns to the larger picture of our existence as a whole. Sometimes, however, the flood of thoughts refuses to slow no matter what we do. Our nerves are so frayed that we cannot achieve the simple peace of looking out the window and enjoying the view without anything coming to mind. That’s when you might employ the stop exercise. In the midst of a thought or daydream, tell yourself to stop and abruptly cut short what is going on in your mind. Then relax your body and look around you, just seeing what is there. Take a vacation from the inner turmoil.
So our daily practice for recovering from a life polluted with negative emotional habits includes: objective observation of our selves, separation from negative states, quieting the mind, and becoming present to the moment. You will notice how these practices begin to take us out of our usual nervous tension and keep us from mindlessly responding to everything around us by turning a portion of our attention inward and by expanding our perspective in the moment. We then become more than our self-centered, habitual mass of reactions.
If you apply these techniques regularly, you will soon find yourself living more frequently in that space of peace, of centeredness, of recovery from being victims of automatic reactions. Then you will find that you become capable of a serenity and acceptance of what is, of a surrender of selfishness that empowers you to help others as well as yourself.
Such a journey of emotional and psychological recovery offers us a new spiritual empowerment which enables us to accept life as it comes, even with all its complications and the capacity to act rightly in any given situation. This developing inner power creates a free human being who is no longer entangled in his or her selfishness and constant stream of fears and desires. Such a person can journey through life in peace, with wisdom and compassion. Such a person makes the world a better place.
About the Author
Ted Nottingham is the author and translator of a dozen books, the producer of numerous televised programs, and the pastor of Northwood Christian Church in Indianapolis, Indiana.
As a clairvoyant and healer, I understand the importance of grounding myself on a regular basis. When you possess the ability read energy from a higher conscious place, it’s so easy for your soul to automatically transition into Spirit. In other words, you want to be in the place where you are channeling Energy. Yet, we live on Earth so we must remain present here in our daily lives.
So what are the symptoms of not being grounded? Here are just a few that you might identify with:
- Feeling like your head is in the clouds
- Difficulty concentrating
- Forgetting things often
- Losing track of time
- Not living in the Present.
- Feeling constantly in worry mode
- Being accident prone
- Frequent mood swings.
- Avoiding life by excessively sleeping, reading, video games, drinking, TV etc..
- Feeling drained by other people
Here are a few tips that will keep you grounded, and make you feel like you’re on planet Earth once again:
Complete a Grounding Exercise
When you wake up every morning, place your feet on the ground, and imagine the roots of a tree, wrapping around the tops of your feet and going to the center of the core of the earth. You may also repeat this several times a day or simply say the words “Grounded” out loud or in your mind. My feet always tingle when I do this.
Eat earthy foods.
Avoid processed foods whenever possible eat whole grains, vegetable proteins such as legumes, root vegetables, minerals like calcium and iron., and red coloured foods that activate your root chakra.
This may be obvious but so many people hold their breath when they are stressed out. Take several time a day to take several deep breaths, and allow the oxygen to flow into every cell of your body. You will feel revived and refreshed.
Take a Hot Bath or Shower.
After an emotionally draining day, take a hot bath and sprinkle some epsom salts. Water itself is purifying and the sea salts work to detoxify all of the accumulated negative energies that you have gathered throughout your day. Always rinse the salt off of your body before you get out. If you are showering, sprinkle some epsom salts onto your lufa, and imagine all of the negative energy going down the drain.
Be with Nature
Nature is one of the most powerful healing agents in the world. Spend time with the forest, ocean, rivers and mountain peaks. Nature’s energy is incredibly healing. Have you ever leaned up against a tree and felt the energy of the tree healing you? Mother Nature has the ability to repair the cells in your body. It’s such a gift and it’s right outside your door!
Extra Tip: For an even stronger grounding and healing connection to the Earth, take your shoes and socks off.
Remember that we all need to stay grounded in order to live a happy and productive life.
Maxine Friend – About the Author:
Voted as most popular clairvoyant in Vancouver, Maxine dedicated much of her time and energy to noteworthy causes. Maxine is a member of the Canadian Association of Psychics, and is also an active member of the Scleroderma Association of British Columbia. Maxine has created her own fund in honour of her late mother. “In honour of Lise Friend” in order to raise money for Scleroderma research. Maxine is a level II Certified Reiki practitioner; specializing in Usui Reiki Ryoho. In her spare time, Maxine mentors other developing clairvoyants. Maxine also is a special investigative consultant with Find Me; a non for profit organization that assists people from all over the world in finding their missing loved ones.
“The more and more each is impelled by that which is intuitive, or the relying upon the soul force within, the greater, the farther, the deeper, the broader, the more constructive may be the result.” Edgar Cayce
Intuition is defined as ‘a thing that one knows or considers likely from instinctive feeling rather than conscious reasoning.’ The word ‘intuition’ comes from the Latin word “intueri”, which means to see within.
Intuition has been referred to in many different ways including sixth sense, following your heart, guidance, inspiration and inner wisdom. However we may choose to refer to it, the Law of Attraction explains that everyone is an extension of source energy and has access to infinite intelligence within them. Also, as everyone is unique with unique intentions and desires, everyone’s guidance from infinite intelligence is unique to them.
Guidance or intuition can come in many different forms including feelings, dreams, visions, hearing the same thing several times in a short period of time and synchronicities. However, whilst it can come in different ways some of which are outer signs you can know the significance of it by how it feels. There are also different reasons as to why you receive guidance, often it is to lead you in a particular direction, whilst at other times it is to reassure you that things are working out for you and that there is a loving universe that is aware of and assisting you.
It has been that said that guidance takes into account an infinite number of factors from a higher perspective and that usually we are not aware of all of these factors as if we were, we would be overloaded with unnecessary information when all we need is the guidance about what to do or what to think. In relation to this sometimes the guidance doesn’t seem logical, however the more people begin to pay attention to it, the more they usually see that it is assisting them. For instance as guidance is operating in a non-linear framework, someone’s guidance might tell them to meet a friend on Saturday afternoon but logically they know they can’t because they have a client on Saturday afternoon, however their infinite intelligence is taking into account the fact that the client is going to reschedule their appointment. Another interesting aspect of guidance is that usually you are not given guidance for the whole of your journey but rather moment by moment guidance for the next step.
A key part of living the Law of Attraction is developing an increased awareness of and relationship with your intuition. People are sometimes taught to listen to others, rather than to follow what feels right to them, however as they begin to increasingly follow their own guidance, they become more of their own authority in their life and to know that their unique guidance matters. Following your own guidance also leads to life being easier and more of an exciting adventure.
It can be best to begin to follow your guidance on things that are more inconsequential such as which way to walk or drive. The more you listen to and follow your guidance the more you will then having an increasing ability to discern what is guidance and what isn’t and you will gain more and more confidence and trust in your own guidance and how it is benefiting you.
Whilst guidance is always available there are several things that you can do to open yourself to receive it more. One powerful way is to firstly begin to pay attention to it and to appreciate it when you do receive it, as this will keep you in a receptive mode to allow more guidance to flow. Also, as infinite intelligence is operating on the level of love and appreciation through doing regular lists of appreciation you will have greater access to guidance. Furthermore meditating regularly clears the mind which allows guidance to be more easily recognised.
A final technique that can be useful if you have a particular decision to make, is to write down a request to the universe such as “allow me to know which direction to take in my life” and to then go into meditation. Very often through having firstly clarified and focused on the question by writing it, an answer will come to you during the unresisted time of meditation. However, even if it doesn’t come to you immediately if you do your best to stay open to receiving an answer at a later time, the answer will very likely come.
Tracy Friend – About the Author:
Tracy Friend, is a leading authority on the Law of Attraction philosophy whose profound yet practical teachings have touched the lives of thousands across the UK, Europe and the US.
She is co-founder of the Law of Attraction Centre, which was established in 2003 and is the largest and most trusted organisation in Europe dedicated to teaching the practical application of the Law of Attraction teachings.
Through proven technology delivered through workshops, groups and products including books, audios and meditation CDs, The Law of Attraction Centre’s objective is to share tools to encourage self-empowerment, improving the quality of people’s lives and helping change the world for the better.
With its base in London, UK and other communities around the UK and internationally, The Law of Attraction Centre has over 3,500 members focused on the study and practice of the Law of Attraction, with over 800 groups and events having been organised to date.
In addition to hosting weekly groups both online and offline, Tracy maintains a rigorous workshop schedule.
Tracy’s ventures also include the creation of Meditation 101 Live™, a free online meditation experience with webinars on most days, it provides a space for people to meditate with other’s from across the world. Tracy’s Creating a Wonderful Life, Living in Love, Opening to Abundance and Happy Body visualisations have been designed as tools to assist you in using the power of guided visualisation to bring all of your dreams and desires into fruition. Tracy has also produced a four part on–demand Living the Law of Attraction Online Training Course and a three part on-demand Opening to Abundance Online Training Course.
In Tracy’s one to one coaching practice she has helped people in the fields of health, wellbeing and relationships.
When Tracy is not running Law of Attraction events and coaching, she loves to travel and to continue her life’s study of human potential and well-being.